I know I said I would give you guys an update yesterday, after the first session, but to tell the truth I was completely knocked out afterwards. In every way you can be knocked out. Except unconsiousness.
The first thing we did, after introducing ourselves, was to each take a blank paper and on it write or draw something that symbolises our life. Then we were to show the others and kind of explain a bit about what we had written or drawn. One girl for example wants to be a musician and studies music at college, so her drawing had lots of elements relating to that. I wrote about how I felt at the moment, during the day and what my goal is. Then we were divided into two pairs (we are only four in the group) and set to answer a number of questions, with group discussion afterwards.

At the end of the two hours we set up a few basic rules. For example that the phones are to be shut of or on silent mode if you're expecting an important phonecall. It's ok to leave the room for a few minutes if things get too difficult, stuff like that. We also got a sheet of paper with different themes that we could go through over the next nine sessions. One of these was sharing your story. That's next week. That one's going to be a real bugger although it's important for us to understand each other from the get-go. Going today was tough but felt right, and I'm proud of myself. That's something everyone should remember: When you accomplish something, no matter how big or how small that "something" is, be proud. After all, you've crossed a mental line. Setting up a goal and then passing it.

Tomorrow the group therapy starts. Ten weeks of talking, listening and working with different kinds of exercises. I have a long list of "What if?". What if it doesn't work? What if it has the opposite effect? What if I don't dare to speak? On and on. I think the hardest thing will be actually daring to speak in front of the others. If I just pass that hurdle I have a feeling it will work out one way or the other,
 I'll post an update tomorrow.

I had an email a couple of days ago. I'll start going to group in like two weeks.

The group will consist of a therapist and 5-7 participants, ranging from age 19 and up. During the first meeting we will mostly present ourselves and lay up some general rules. After that, it's time to work! Each session will be for two hours, once a week for ten weeks. Sometimes we'll have discussions, sometimes focus on one of us in particular. I might already have mentioned this but one of the criteria is to be ready to talk, but more importantly: ready to listen to what each of us are saying no matter what pops out.  Quite intensive. I'm kind of nervous obviously, I've never done this kind of thing before but I'm confident it will help.

Always start new journeys with a positive attitude, because well begun is half done!